Lurking vs Engaging

Today's VEDA question is about YouTube lurking. Specifically, is there a type of video you watch, but you don't make yourself. The short answer to that is "yes" because I am not a YouTuber. I am a blogger, and writing is my thing. I'm doing VEDA for reasons hitherto discussed. I watch all sorts of things on YouTube that I don't make. Specifically, music videos. Lo! It was my dream to direct music videos! Alas, it did not come to pass.

I also dreamed of owning this house.
"But there are dreams that cannot be!
And there are storms we cannot weather!"

But this question got me to thinking about something else: Facebook. I try my level best not to lurk on Facebook. I used to do that, and all it did was make me really sad and angry. Everyone's life seemed so much better than mine. No one was talking to me. Lurking on Facebook will wreak havoc on your self-esteem.

But then I started engaging. You know, kind of like how you're supposed to do life? And what do you know! I felt better about the whole experience!

The sad truth is this: Facebook and the internet are now my window to "the world I know". I don't have a strong community here in Fayetteville, but I have quite a nice support system online. It's not ideal. I still long for flesh and blood connections. But it's better than nothing.

Through Facebook I have been able to keep in contact with and reconnect with some of the most awesome people I've known throughout my life. We have lively, intellectual, and fun banter. We share funny memes. They "like" my photos. I "like" their photos. We keep each other up to date on important topics, like politics, music, and professional wrestling. This keeps me from jumping out the window.

Some days are better than others . . .

Lurking on the other hand, that totally makes me want to jump out the window. It is inherently negative. You stare at a screen, and you compare your life to what you see, you judge what you see, and you feel very left out. But here's the truth: by not engaging, you are leaving yourself out. You have to take some responsibility for your experience.

The same thing applies in most social media, I think. If you want people to watch your YouTube videos, you have to watch and THOUGHTFULLY comment on others. This is to say: Don't go around asking for likes, comments, friends, or subscribers. That's tacky. I'd like to think we all know better, but then I see some kid doing exactly this and  I bang my head repeatedly into the keyboard.

Key Points

• When you talk to people, they usually talk back.
• Your life is just as worthy to share as anyone else's.
• Don't ask for attention. Earn it by giving people your attention.
• Engage with people. Put yourself out there.
• Don't spend too much time online. Apply the above to your actual life.