Today is Nick Rhodes’ birthday. I would love nothing more than to be able to go back to Palatka alone and do my antiquing and sit in the City Café and write and eat something involving Strawberries since they are St. Nick’s favorite food.
Nick Rhodes has been a fixture in my life since I was 12 and I first got internet at the house. I have known who Duran Duran was since 6th grade when my mom bought me the Medazzaland album. Whatever you do, do not get me started on Duran Duran history and Discography, because I can go on and on.
“Well, things really started to fall apart with the original lineup around the time of Notorious, but I think it was time for the band to go in a new direction anyway. The 80’s were ending and they needed to evolve. It was at this time that they brought in former Missing Persons guitarist Warren Cuccurullo to replace Andy Taylor, but they wouldn’t bring him on as a full fledged band member until 1990’s Liberty. That album also had Sterl – oh. You don’t care . . ."
When I got the Medazzaland album, I wasn’t sure what to make of it. At the time, all I knew of the band was the song Ordinary World which always has been and always will be my favorite song. I love music and I love a whole lot of songs, but there’s no song that moves me in quite the way that one does.
It’s an anthem. It speaks to everyone. It’s beautiful. I don’t know enough about music to be able to tell you what key it’s written in, but whatever it is, it pulls at my very essence and for 5 minutes and 40 seconds pulls me away from myself. I am transcended. I am greater than myself.
“Papers in the roadside tell of suffering and grief – here today, forgot tomorrow. Beside the news of holy war and holy need, ours is just a little sorrow now.”
Maybe this makes me sound like I have a real sense of global Schaudenfreude, but I think those lines are more comforting and uplifting than anything I ever read in a holy book or heard sung in a hymn. Who needs pipe organs and robed choirs when we have pop music?
The Medazzaland album art was hot pink and white with what can only be described as graffiti like art throughout. There were some pop art looking drawings of the band members, who at the time were Simon Lebon, Warren, and Nick. It was the smallest the group had ever been, but that’s the Duran Duran that I met, so to me, it will always be the best lineup.
I didn’t mind when John Taylor came back, and I’m alright my Roger Taylor, but I would trade Andy Taylor for Warren any day of the week. He is a better guitarist and he’s not a self important prick. Anyway, the album art didn’t really belie what these guys actually looked like and to tell you the truth, I thought that they were a fairly contemporary band.
It wasn’t until I got the internet that I discovered that they had been around longer than I had and that they were a good looking bunch of guys. From day one, I was a Nick fan. In 1998, there was an angel fire site (‘member that?) called The Temple of St. Nick. This was fan fic (I think) and so it was nothing but hundreds and hundreds of career spanning photos of the boy. There was a biography page as well that told little known facts about him. This is where I learned that his favorite food was Strawberries, cus, ya know, if you read it on the internet, it’s the gospel. I also learned that he was 5’6” (I think he's actually closer to 5'8"), what kind of synthesizer he used, and that he was a vegetarian.And so began my long struggle to become one myself.
Over the years there have been several people who I have allowed to influence my life in such ways. I love Lou Reed and am taking up Tai Chi. I love Leonard Cohen and now practice Zen. I love David Bowie and used to wear blue glitter eye makeup (when it was so out of vogue that it may as well had been clown makeup) and I love John Waters and have subsequently become a film junkie.
Maybe this shows a lack of character on my part, but I’ve always chosen to emulate my idols in ways that would better myself. I don’t do heroin, cocaine, drink, smoke, or make it a point to get arrested in order to be more like them. We strive to be more like God, but we don’t go around committing Sodom and Gomorrah-like genocide in order to do it. Well, most of us don’t. Westboro Baptist Church probably would if they could.
I have finally come to terms with the fact that I just don’t have the self control to irradicate meat from my diet. I don’t agree with taking life, but I also have found that I am allergic to soy and that I am anemic. I need meat for my health, in moderation, and my health is more important than my need to gain nonexistent approval from Nick Rhodes over my dietary decisions.
I don’t want to hear from all the militant vegans out there either. You have made the decision to not eat animal products and I support you decision and your right to make it. I kindly ask that you do the same, and know that this didn’t happen without significant effort on my part. I like vegetarian products, but they don’t like me and I am not going to be crazy and miserable anymore just so that I can feel superior because I don’t eat meat. Why am I justifying myself to you anyway? Look, I make an effort to eat ethically and locally raised meats, and I don’t eat a whole lot of em’. I eat a mostly Paleo diet, although I’m not 100% comfortable with labeling myself Paleo. I’m not sure what all comes in that package. And, maybe one day when my health is better and I live somewhere like Seattle, I’ll give it another go. But right now, it’s not at the top of my list. I digress . . .
Nick was beautiful. I think that there’s this phase that all girls go through when they are in middle school where they are attracted to the most effeminate or otherwise androgynous men. There’s something fun about the idea that you could share clothes and makeup with your boyfriend. I think this has everything to do with narcissism. Teenage girls are notoriously self centered, and although I deny it until I am blue in the face, I was surely no different.
I loved the makeup he wore and the angular bone structure in his face. I loved the fop clothes, the Italian shoes, and the bleach blonde hair. Oh, the hair. I always wanted to bleach my hair out and be an edgy platinum blonde with short hair. Sadly, the fact of the matter is that the one time I tried to bleach out even a little bit of my hair (it was right after X-Men came out and I was trying to go for the Rogue look) it turned this brassy orange color. It was never going to work if I tried my whole head. My hair would fry and break and then I’d be bald like Debbie Harry. It was never that meant to be. But I could damn sure be in love with any and everyone who had that which I had so desperately coveted. That might explain my unfaltering allegiance to Slim Shady.
Medazzaland was an interesting album as far as Nick Rhodes was concerned. It was the first time that he provided vocals for a song – the title track in fact. I don’t know why I wrote that, and I don’t know what I was getting at here with this Nick Rhodes rant. I’m sure it had something to do with me loving Nick forever but starting to forsake him for Simon as I have grown up, but feeling guilty about my faltering allegiance . . .
I still love Nick and I think he’s interesting and brilliant and I would love to sit town over a cup of coffee with him just to hear what he has to say about things. But as far as attraction – that which represents a viable mate – I’ve been won over by the cult of Simon. He’s handsome, a good father, and a faithful husband. When we are grown, that’s all any of us ask for, isn’t it? Of course, the sheckles and gold records don’t hurt.
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